How Co-Parents Can Make the Holidays Special for Their Child

 Posted on November 26, 2024 in Child Custody

If you and your ex have children, you will likely be dealing with child issues until they are grown. Because of this, it is essential that you learn to co-parent peacefully regardless of how you feel about one another. The holidays can be difficult for all those involved. If the allocation of parental responsibilities dictates that your children will be spending a major holiday with your ex, it can be emotionally wrenching to think about Thanksgiving or Christmas without your children.

This can be a painful reminder of when you, your ex, and your children were a family. If you find yourself in this situation, it is time to set your own sadness or depression aside and work with your ex to make sure your children have a happy holiday season. In addition to the tips and suggestions below, a Will County, IL family law attorney from Law Office of Ronald L. Hendrix, P.C. can help if you have legal questions related to your divorce or the allocation of parental responsibilities.  

Ways to Make the Holidays Special for Your Children – Even if You Will Not Be with Them

Vow to make the holiday special, regardless of whether the children are with you or their other parent. Consider the following:

• If your children will be spending Christmas with your ex, consider having your own "Christmas" celebration on another day, perhaps a couple of days ahead of the actual holiday. Decorate the house, make it look festive, and cook all your family’s favorites for your not-quite Christmas celebration.  
• Coordinate with your ex on gifts for the children to avoid duplicates. You may even choose to go in together to purchase a more expensive gift.
•  Bake holiday cookies or treats with your children before the holiday. If you live in an area amenable to sledding or ice skating, consider these activities, followed by hot cocoa and Christmas shopping.
• While it may be the last thing you want to do, help your children buy their other parent a gift for the holidays. They will be excited to take a gift; your ex might even appreciate the gesture.
•  Discuss calling your children on the actual holiday with your ex beforehand so it will not be a potentially unwelcome surprise to him or her that places a damper on your children’s holiday.
• When your children return from their holiday, let them tell you about all the fun they had. If you are less financially able to provide fun excursions, it may be difficult to hear that your ex took them on expensive outings, but children remember the feelings, not the money spent.
• Create your own "after-holiday" celebration by having a pajama/pizza party to welcome your children home.

Helping Yourself Get Through a Holiday Without Your Children

This may be your first holiday without your children, or it could be one of many. Do not isolate yourself; spend time with friends and family who love and support you. Consider volunteering during the holiday season, whether that means serving a meal at your local homeless shelter or preparing care packages for overseas military personnel.

This can give you a different perspective on spending a holiday alone and can make you feel good about helping another person. If you can afford it, treat yourself to something that makes you happy during the holiday. If money is tight, put on your coziest pajamas and watch a great movie with a friend while eating the treats you like.

Contact a DuPage County, IL Parental Responsibilities Lawyer

Divorce is never easy, and the aftermath - particularly holidays - can be difficult. If you are just now considering divorce, a Naperville, IL parental responsibilities attorney can help ensure that your custody agreement with your ex is fair and in the best interests of your child or children. Attorney Ronald Hendrix holds a master’s degree in guidance and counseling in addition to his law degree and is a court-appointed mediator. Contact Law Office of Ronald L. Hendrix, P.C. at 630-355-7776 to schedule your free consultation.